Michelle Ray

Business and Leadership Keynote Speaker

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New Year…New Career: Are you ready for “me” management?

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This is the time of year when many people set New Years’ Resolutions or big goals for future. You may be thinking that 2012 is the year to start a new venture and finally resolve to start a new business or make a career change that has been on your mind for a considerable period of time. As exciting as your plans may be, you want to ensure to the best of your ability that your goals come to fruition.  We have all heard sayings such as “the only place that success comes before work is in the dictionary” and although it is one of the most overused clichés on the planet, the fact remains that many small businesses and solopreneurs fail because they mistakenly believe that self-employment provides a glamorous lifestyle. In my experience, nothing could be further from the truth. While there is no doubt that I enjoy my daily working life without routines or bosses (and wouldn’t have it any other way), buying into the notion that I no longer answer to anyone and can do whatever I please is not a winning strategy for long-term success. When it comes to practicing self-leadership at work and in business, it is important not to underestimate the challenges associated with being your own boss while deciding whether it is really for you.

Having entrepreneurial roots did not give me the rite of passage to financial freedom. It took considerable time for me to see my business as a viable enterprise. If I wanted to merely survive and make enough money to pay my rent and living expenses, I could have remained employed. However, the primary motivator was based on a lack of fulfillment.  My decision to start my first business as a speaker was based primarily on lifestyle considerations, coupled with the belief that if it were a truly viable enterprise that allowed me to do what I loved, it could afford me a way of life that would be immensely gratifying. At the core, I believed in myself enough to take the risk.

If you are contemplating leaving your job or starting a new venture, your capacity to be brutally honest regarding your expectations is a good place to start. When it comes to making choices such as pursuing a new vocation or business, your most important asset is mindfulness. It is all about practicing “me” management…being able to effectively manage yourself. The first step requires honing an unfamiliar kind of mental toughness that will force you to personally dig deep and assess your own reality while loving what you do in order to stay the course.

Achieving professional success is not only about honing one’s business acumen. It requires the ability to truly lead oneself by clarifying one’s values and beliefs. The truth is that many of us buy into the accepted wisdoms of society rather than formulating our own. As a result, we experience an inner conflict as the real “me” is trying to find the way. For example, do you value balance and are you “living it”? Can you discern your own truth and are you able to follow through on your own values and beliefs by putting them into action, rather than rhetoric? This type of values test invariably comes with the territory when you are your own boss. The more clarity we gain around our values, the more effective “me” management becomes. Are you ready?

 PS: Look for my brand new book and website in 2012!

2012: Photo by Salvatore Vuono

 

Getting Unstuck: Finding momentum to create change

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The truth is that many of us are never taught how to lead ourselves at work, in business and in life. As a result, we settle for mediocrity and dissatisfaction.  Why is it that so many talented, creative people stay in jobs that make them miserable?  Is it because family responsibilities must come first and the financial risks associated with leaving are too great? Is it the fear of the unknown, the comfort of the status quo? “Better the devil you know”…etc? Or is self-doubt, a lack of faith, trust…perhaps all of the above? We have a burning desire to transform professionally and personally, to alter the course of our vocation, to let go of people and situations that no longer serve us, yet we hold back. Until the level of discontent becomes greater than the fear of change; we will stay stuck, perhaps for many years.

The Towers Watson’s 2010 Global Workforce Study of over 22,000 employees in 22 markets revealed some key points regarding career change and choices. These are particularly interesting findings for anyone considering making life-altering decisions regarding one’s professional path. From their surveys, they discovered that mobility is at a decade-long low point, and many are sacrificing career growth for a secure job. Their results also indicated that confidence in leaders and managers is disturbingly low.

A recessionary environment exacerbates the feeling of helplessness, as we believe that we cannot escape our situation. When we experience enormous frustration ith our employer due to a poor relationship and lack of support from our immediate manager, we slowly begin disengaging from our work. When you add these two factors together, it is no wonder that people lose interest in what they are doing and genuinely feel stuck. How do you free yourself from the “trapped” experience?

1.  Realize that self-doubt is often at the core of your fear

In the words of Anaïs Nin: “And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.” Recognize that the opposite of fear is faith. We prefer to stay “safe” and therefore it is understandable that we can easily justify our rationale to maintain the status quo. By listing the “pros” and “cons” associated with moving in, we can get clarity around the feeling of being at an impasse.

2. Pay attention to the signs that are pointing you in another direction

When we are caught up in the fear, we often miss the signs indicating a new path. By taking the step outlined above, we will have more awareness regarding the signposts that are either subtle or flashing neon lights, guiding us elsewhere.

3. If your job and workplace aren’t going to change, it is up to you to initiate change

Staying stuck in a job or career where the situation has become untenable will invariably take a toll. Only you can decide whether that psychological toll of staying outweighs the financial risk of leaving. If you can find the momentum to re-think your attitudes and beliefs around creating change, change will happen!

 

Fish Jumping: Photo by Danilo Rizzuti

 

Workplace Motivation…Three common myths

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One of the old age questions leaders ask is“How do I motivate my team”?  The answer is not as complex as you may think.  In fact, there are a number of myths associated with the notion of creating and maintaining a happy, productive work atmosphere that warrant scrutiny at all levels of an organization. Ask yourself if any of these apply and what you can do to focus on creating more motivators and eliminate, or at the very least minimize the existence of demotivators.

 Myth # 1: The paycheck is a primary motivator

Although remuneration may initially attract people to a particular job, it isn’t enough to sustain interest, productivity and engagement. In fact, money has never been at the top of the list of workplace motivators, yet is often seen as the key solution in the attraction equation. The allure associated with the overall salary package is tangible and short-term. For leaders, providing a pay cheque may be easier than finding the energy to truly connect one-on-one with everyone on a team. Moreover, when individuals say that they are at work “just for the paycheck”, they are denying the existence of a fundamental intrinsic motivator; i.e. to be recognized as a person with deeper needs… as someone who wants to know that they matter in the grand scheme of their workplace. They have something valuable to offer their employer and if they are unable to tap into their unique worth, then simply “showing up at work” becomes are drudgery and emotionally dissatisfying experience.

Myth # 2: Building in more extrinsic motivators creates a better atmosphere 

While it is true that we are all motivated by different things outside of ourselves, the more useful approach for a business in terms of achieving a highly inspired atmosphere is to pay attention to the existence of demotivators, as opposed to the absence of motivators. The most common demotivators include working with chronically negative people, (in management or non-management positions) who successfully drain other peoples’ energy reserves. I have found that a lack of action builds resentment amongst those who desperately want their leadership to deal with these people issues. Another popular belief is that by encouraging people to work longer hours in exchange for a more pay (also known as overtime), people will be motivated to work harder. In effect, longer hours justify a slow-down approach to work and do very little to enhance productivity and profitability. The physiological consequences of overtime are heightened levels of stress, which are in fact demotivators rather than motivators.

Myth #3: Happy people remain satisfied and don’t require as much “nurturing”

There is no doubt that contentment regarding ones workplace and job function is a desired state. However, once we have achieved a sense of fulfillment regarding our work, praise and recognition remain critical as on-going intrinsic motivators. We all require different “strokes” in terms of being acknowledged. A wise leader will recognize the differences between those who seek appreciation privately and publically. Validating effort and results is also an individual responsibility, no matter what our job title may be. Peer recognition is a powerful energizer that is often more meaningful than any other form of appreciation, as we often hold the opinions of our co-workers in the highest regard. Therefore, it behooves us to express admiration and applause for a job well done, regardless of our position.

 

Photo By Renjith Krishnan

Outstanding workplace relationships – the key to retention

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Workplace surveys conducted by Manpower Inc. indicate that despite an economic slow-down, there has been a steady increase in the number of individuals who plan to look for new job opportunities. In 2010, the figure was 60%. In 2011, the estimate was 84%! As the year comes to a close, it will be interesting to note whether the trend continued, as well as predictions for 2012 and beyond. Whether the numbers remain consistent, the impact of workforce mobility and knowledge transfer on organizations cannot be understated. The most common reasons cited for leaving or thinking about leaving a job relate to overall job satisfaction, relationship with one’s immediate manager or supervisor and low morale. The cost of turnover will always be significant and on-going, despite economic conditions.

Yet, while it is true that some aspects of an employee’s decision are outside of an employer’s control, the most neglected area of focus in my view relates to the intangible workplace motivators. The highest priority ought to be on building and sustaining outstanding workplace relationships. If employers paid greater attention to developing a deeper understanding of the make-up of their teams, sought to meaningfully improve communication; as well as a create more informal opportunities for people to connect and share ideas at work, a happier and more productive work atmosphere would ensue.  In a nutshell, organizations place an enormous focus on attracting talent. However, once on board, less attention is given to creating an environment where people want to stay and voluntarily contribute to the overall goals and objectives. In my experience working with businesses of every description, the reason many people become dissatisfied in their jobs is because being heard and acknowledged by management and co-workers is an ultimately lower priority than the work itself.  At all levels, everyone feels the pressure of managing their daily workload.  As a result, paying attention to the human element becomes neglected.

I recently worked with a highway maintenance company, presenting on the topic of improving workplace communication. During their weekend retreat, people privately shared ideas to improve productivity by having a different set of tools available on the job that could cut road maintenance costs by one third in their area. Yet, their crew has no influence on the equipment purchasing decision.  From their perspective,  they feel that their hands-on experience could immediately benefit their employers’ productivity and profitability.  Meanwhile, the leadership team may have examined the business case for purchasing different equipment, although their findings or rationale isn’t apparent to the front line. Opening the lines of communication could make a significant difference. When organizations make the time to listen and create more opportunities for dialogue, miscommunication can be avoided, trust builds and relationships become stronger. In the absence of prioritizing greater connection between management and staff on a regular basis, the seed is planted for growing dissatisfaction in the workplace. Ultimately,  a negative outcome may result in a potential loss of talent and experience that is difficult to replace.

Next blog: Why we stay: Ten strategies to improve workplace relationships

Eight steps to communicating Change

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Using Caring Communication when dealing with Change:  

During the past few months, a trend has emerged regarding the information clients are requesting that I cover during my presentations and workshops. Almost always, the topics of workplace communication and managing change come up during the pre-event conference calls. Therefore, it is no surprise that these two subjects are inexorably linked. We cannot effectively manage change without communication and if we don’t communicate effectively, we experience frustration and resistance to change. There are a myriad of change realities that organizations and individuals are trying to grasp.  How do you confidently communicate change? For organizations, the biggest concerns relate to greater transparency, compliance, accountability, cut-backs and budget constraints. How do organizations communicate these issues without inciting fear and negativity? Unfortunately, blunders occur because change is communicated hurriedly; without careful consideration, thought or care.

At the heart of it all is that people and organizations as a whole are trying to achieve one thing: Buy-in. The question is: “how do I get people to buy into the change process?”  The most important and often neglected fact is that the responsibility for any communication always lies with the SENDER. It does not matter whether communication is face-to-face, email or telephone. It is not the receiver’s job to try and decipher meaning. The sender needs to be clear and adapt the delivery of their message based on the receiver’s preference and style. In order to masterfully communicate change, as the sender and initiator of the communication, the key is in knowing how to deliver the news with sensitivity. The old adage “before I care how much you know, I need to know how much you care” must be recognized in the sequence of communicating change. Emotions first. Logic second.  Here are the steps, in order:

  1. Recognize that change is an emotional experience
  2. Address the receiver’s fears
  3. Tell the recipient/s how the change will benefit THEM
  4. Show them at least one greater benefit of the change that makes sense to them, versus the maintaining the status quo
  5. Ask for input and actively listen to responses
  6. Tell the recipient/s how the change will benefit the organization
  7. Involve the recipient/s in the change process
  8. Celebrate the accomplishment of moving through the change as a team

If you follow these eight steps, plan your delivery and sincerely take the time to think about how the receiver will interpret your news regarding change, the likelihood of a negative reaction will be significantly diminished. Remember, you have already established a reputation based on your current repertoire of communication skills. When you alter your style, people are often suspicious and may doubt your new approach. It takes time to build credibility as a great communicator.

Photo: Time For Change by Salvatore Vuono

Are you happy at work?

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There is no greater waste of energy than getting up in the morning and hating where we spend most of our day.

If we aren’t enjoying our work, chances are that we aren’t much fun to be around.  On the other hand, when we feel inspired at work, we make a difference to our co-workers and those closest to us. Our clients also benefit when we are happy and customer service levels improve dramatically when we feel more connected to our work.

Despite the prevailing pessimism regarding the economy, the 5th-annual Labor Happiness Index commissioned by Snagajob in the U.S. (hourly job specialists with the world’s largest community of hourly workers) recently released some interesting findings on the subject. Although the economy remains a key issue in for workers, these macro-concerns are not preventing individual job happiness. Roughly six in 10 working Americans say they are happy in their current jobs, relatively unchanged in the past three years. The Snagajob survey is showing some consistency in the key contributors to workers’ happiness. Over the past three years — since this particular data has been collected — the top drivers of workplace happiness have been personal satisfaction the job provides (27% this year), feeling fortunate to have a job at all (26%) and the job being a good fit for the worker’s lifestyle (19%). Meanwhile, only 15 percent of workers say that their paycheck is the No. 1 factor that defines their job happiness.

“One message to workers and employers is that the paycheck isn’t everything,” CEO Shawn Boyer said. “While we all want to be compensated fairly for our hard work, most people won’t be truly happy unless they are deriving a sense of pleasure from what they are doing and from what they are contributing to.”

If you are miserable in your job and still feel you aren’t ready to make a job change, or financially you cannot envisage taking the risk right now, realize that you could ultimately pay the highest price in terms of the physiological, psychological and emotional consequences to your well-being.

Even though you are consciously aware of your goals and desire to create change for yourself, recognize that there is a part of the brain that automatically reverts to a fear-based, negative response unconsciously.

Consider athletes who train for the Olympics or World Championship events. They do not allow themselves the luxury of a negative thought during their preparation. Instead, they use visualization to literally create a winning state of mind.  The mental preparedness is equally as important as the physical aspect of their training. Therefore, with discipline, repetition and practice, you can begin to alter the pattern of your thinking in order override the “pre-programmed” response mechanism.

 

 

The world through kaleidoscope eyes

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“The voyage of discovery is not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes”…Marcel Proust

This morning I found myself tuned into my favourite radio station, singing along with the Beatles and their memorable hit “Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds”.  It made me curious about the origin of the lyrics, so I decided to do some research. The “Lucy” in the song was a classmate of John Lennon’s eldest son, Julian. Julian had drawn a picture of Lucy as well as stars in the sky and brought it home from school one day when he was four years old. He called the picture “Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds”. Many people thought that the initials of the song as well as the lyrics represented getting high on the drug LSD.  Rolling Stone magazine once asked John Lennon about this very question. He told the reporter that he had never even considered the initials of the song, let alone the interpretation. Personally, I remain curious about Lucy. Was she the “the girl with kaleidoscope eyes” or was it ultimately Yoko Ono? Perhaps we will never know.

My findings about the song caused me to ponder the manner in which we attach meaning to things, even though we may not have all the facts. If all of us interpreted people, their behaviour and situations in an identical fashion, the world would quickly become a dull place. Instead, consider looking at life through a kaleidoscope and become an “observer of beautiful forms” (the ancient Greek translation for kaleidoscope). We can unravel a deeper meaning behind what we think we see when we become more receptive to looking at life through a broader lens. How often have you found that your original perception of a particular person or circumstance was flawed?  Upon further investigation, you uncovered fresh and exciting information that gave you a renewed appreciation for the relationship. These are the experiences that we need to draw upon whenever we catch ourselves in “black and white” mode; convinced that we are right. Instead, when you find yourself taking a myopic view, consider the words of French novelist Marcel Proust: “The voyage of discovery is not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes.”

 

Photo by Koratmember

Flexing your resiliency muscle

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When you search the word “resiliency” on Google, you will see over 5, 500,000 results. What a fascinating statistic for a word that encapsulates an essential character trait that lies at the core of every individual. What makes a person resilient? Can resiliency be taught or are some people better able to rebound from adversity than others? There is certainly a “buzz” around the term in business as well…given the volatility of the economy. What about the roller coaster ride of the stock market that many of us are reluctantly enduring, even though the nausea has us reaching out for the airsickness bag on a regular basis? Why do we choose to stick it out? Is it due to the fact that we are enjoying the ride? I don’t think so.  Or, perhaps it is because we identify with this premise: We are eternally optimistic about the future because we possess an inner- knowing based on our past risk-taking experiences that ultimately, the economy will prevail and the peaks and valleys are part of the journey. This is more than practicing blind faith.  Rather, by viewing current circumstances in these terms, we are demonstrating an understanding of what it means to employ resiliency as a habit.

Our professional and personal lives are inexorably linked.  We have learned that adversity is a natural part of every aspect of our lives. We know that although there are times when the discomfort is almost too much to bear, the alternative option of panic would place us in an anxiety-prone state; yielding results that could be far worse. Resiliency is the cornerstone of our emotional and psychological survival in challenging times. We often underestimate our ability to rise above extremely difficult situations.

For example, at a recent meeting of the American Psychological Association, the question of resiliency in relation to aftermath of the terrorist attacks on September 11, 2001 was on the agenda. Although there was general agreement regarding the psychological magnitude immediately following the event, there were differences in opinion regarding the long-term impact. One psychologist commented as follows:  “I think we are wired to deal with trauma…It’s not only in the person. There’s lots of other factors that determine whether (a person will) be resilient or not…Part of it has to do with who they are, their circumstances, the resources at their disposal, their own trauma histories. They’re less resilient if they have health problems or a history of traumatic reactions, or lack economic resources.”

In order to rise above current challenges,  we need to focus on developing a mindset of managing rather than coping . Getting a grip, is hardly a proactive approach! Yet, it is a business and life strategy that many individuals and organizations adopt in order to deal with adversity as well as uncertainty.  Rather, the solution lies in the willingness to dig deep and gain strength from past experiences. We can overcome seemingly  impossible challenges in the present by drawing upon our own inner resources.  Ask yourself: “How do I perceive the enormity of my current challenge?”  When faced with a particular conundrum that feels overwhelming, reflect on a different time in your life when you felt similar angst and were able to triumph over the situation. As a result, you will prove to yourself that your resiliency muscle can be exercised anytime. All that is needed now is for you to flex it!

Applying the wisdom of Polonius in uncertain times

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I recently attended the National Speakers Association Annual Convention. It is always a highlight of my own professional development quest and yearly “boost”. I see myself as a lifelong learner who can always find someone who is further along in my career and life path to teach me a great deal. For example, I had the pleasure of hearing the legendary Les Brown who rocked the house full of speakers; demonstrating not only the art of connecting with the audience and crafting a memorable speech, he also shared three thoughts on why people are failing today:

1. Most people don’t believe in themselves
2. They are influenced by negative information
3. They are in a new world and need a new mindset

Les’s presentation resonated with me because I share his philosophy. I believe that the solution to these three problems lies in getting to the essence of what rings true for you. Once you focus on what is within your control and you resolve to channel your energy in that direction, life becomes easier and more joyful. Business decisions become less complex when the focus is more about responding rather than reacting to economic forces over which you have no control. You can disseminate information and then decide on your own truth. However, the degree to which you are able to differentiate yourself from the opinions of others will determine how easily you are able to make up your own mind about your current reality. A multitude of forces can sway you in a particular direction…either positive or negative. This is true for individuals as well as businesses of every description. The proliferation of media; both on- line and in traditional formats, are vying for your attention at an unprecedented rate. Therefore, the ability to discern fact from fiction, genuineness from phoniness, substance from fiction is not as easy as it used to be. In the play Hamlet, by William Shakespeare, the fictional character Polonius said: “This above all: To thine own self be true.”

Consider the life path of Kyle Maynard. Kyle is an extraordinary 25 year old motivational speaker who was born with a condition known as congenital amputation that has left him with arms that end at the elbows and legs that end near his knees. When many thought he was crazy, he learned how to become a wrestler and mix martial arts champion; excelling at both. Kyle also shared his powerful message at the convention, delivering insights on dealing with his own self-doubt and the many occasions when he chose not to buy into the negative opinions of others.

Here is what I learned from Kyle:

1. Put your mind to work and everything is possible
2. Negative thoughts are at the core of self-limiting beliefs
3. You have the power to formulate your own attitudes and transform your current reality

The answer to this burning question: “How well do you know yourself?” can lead you to a new world and a new reality. It may require a radical rearrangement of your current way of thinking. It may mean letting go of assumptions that are no longer serving you.  It may necessitate separating yourself from all the negative influencers in order to create different outcomes personally and professionally. One thing I know for certain is that the exploration is a worthy endeavor.

Are you being sucked into the vortex of negativity?

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The degree to which we allow ourselves to be influenced by others cannot be understated. By “others” we may consider the mass media as well as individuals in our personal and professional circle. We rely on mass media to obtain information in order to stay abreast of local, national and global news, to educate ourselves regarding purchasing decisions of every description. We gain trust and establish loyalty patterns with a particular media source and view the source as credible and reputable. Yet, due to a series of mergers and acquisitions over the past fifty years, ninety five percent of information sources are now owned by only five companies. The impact of their influence on business and society as a whole is profound. They shape our culture and value systems; therefore it is no surprise that there is push-back when it comes to challenging the status quo or even more interestingly, we have more difficulty discerning our core truth. What do we truly believe to be true?

How do we extricate ourselves from the power of their influence? When we read about the down economy, “the great recession” we believe this to be the universal truth. We see the statistics, we hear the news broadcasts, we read the tweets, the blogs, books…the negative headlines are all-consuming. When enough people tell us that “things are really bad…they couldn’t get any worse”,   the negative message continues to be reinforced.

 Therefore, it is not a surprise that the process of discerning your own reality becomes even more difficult. Ask yourself: “What is my truth”?  Dig deep to find your own interpretation of what rings true for you. Are you holding yourself back from taking a risk that would completely re-energize and reinvigorate you; whether it is a new career, or starting a business that is your true passion? Identify the emotion that is standing in your way.  Do you associate with negative people? What can you personally do to overcome these obstacles? When your desire to create change is greater than your desire to repeat the same pattern that continues to yield the same result, you will then be ready to let go and respond differently to the negative influencers.