Michelle Ray

Business and Leadership Keynote Speaker

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Michelle Ray

Eight steps to communicating Change

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Using Caring Communication when dealing with Change:  

During the past few months, a trend has emerged regarding the information clients are requesting that I cover during my presentations and workshops. Almost always, the topics of workplace communication and managing change come up during the pre-event conference calls. Therefore, it is no surprise that these two subjects are inexorably linked. We cannot effectively manage change without communication and if we don’t communicate effectively, we experience frustration and resistance to change. There are a myriad of change realities that organizations and individuals are trying to grasp.  How do you confidently communicate change? For organizations, the biggest concerns relate to greater transparency, compliance, accountability, cut-backs and budget constraints. How do organizations communicate these issues without inciting fear and negativity? Unfortunately, blunders occur because change is communicated hurriedly; without careful consideration, thought or care.

At the heart of it all is that people and organizations as a whole are trying to achieve one thing: Buy-in. The question is: “how do I get people to buy into the change process?”  The most important and often neglected fact is that the responsibility for any communication always lies with the SENDER. It does not matter whether communication is face-to-face, email or telephone. It is not the receiver’s job to try and decipher meaning. The sender needs to be clear and adapt the delivery of their message based on the receiver’s preference and style. In order to masterfully communicate change, as the sender and initiator of the communication, the key is in knowing how to deliver the news with sensitivity. The old adage “before I care how much you know, I need to know how much you care” must be recognized in the sequence of communicating change. Emotions first. Logic second.  Here are the steps, in order:

  1. Recognize that change is an emotional experience
  2. Address the receiver’s fears
  3. Tell the recipient/s how the change will benefit THEM
  4. Show them at least one greater benefit of the change that makes sense to them, versus the maintaining the status quo
  5. Ask for input and actively listen to responses
  6. Tell the recipient/s how the change will benefit the organization
  7. Involve the recipient/s in the change process
  8. Celebrate the accomplishment of moving through the change as a team

If you follow these eight steps, plan your delivery and sincerely take the time to think about how the receiver will interpret your news regarding change, the likelihood of a negative reaction will be significantly diminished. Remember, you have already established a reputation based on your current repertoire of communication skills. When you alter your style, people are often suspicious and may doubt your new approach. It takes time to build credibility as a great communicator.

Photo: Time For Change by Salvatore Vuono

Are you happy at work?

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There is no greater waste of energy than getting up in the morning and hating where we spend most of our day.

If we aren’t enjoying our work, chances are that we aren’t much fun to be around.  On the other hand, when we feel inspired at work, we make a difference to our co-workers and those closest to us. Our clients also benefit when we are happy and customer service levels improve dramatically when we feel more connected to our work.

Despite the prevailing pessimism regarding the economy, the 5th-annual Labor Happiness Index commissioned by Snagajob in the U.S. (hourly job specialists with the world’s largest community of hourly workers) recently released some interesting findings on the subject. Although the economy remains a key issue in for workers, these macro-concerns are not preventing individual job happiness. Roughly six in 10 working Americans say they are happy in their current jobs, relatively unchanged in the past three years. The Snagajob survey is showing some consistency in the key contributors to workers’ happiness. Over the past three years — since this particular data has been collected — the top drivers of workplace happiness have been personal satisfaction the job provides (27% this year), feeling fortunate to have a job at all (26%) and the job being a good fit for the worker’s lifestyle (19%). Meanwhile, only 15 percent of workers say that their paycheck is the No. 1 factor that defines their job happiness.

“One message to workers and employers is that the paycheck isn’t everything,” CEO Shawn Boyer said. “While we all want to be compensated fairly for our hard work, most people won’t be truly happy unless they are deriving a sense of pleasure from what they are doing and from what they are contributing to.”

If you are miserable in your job and still feel you aren’t ready to make a job change, or financially you cannot envisage taking the risk right now, realize that you could ultimately pay the highest price in terms of the physiological, psychological and emotional consequences to your well-being.

Even though you are consciously aware of your goals and desire to create change for yourself, recognize that there is a part of the brain that automatically reverts to a fear-based, negative response unconsciously.

Consider athletes who train for the Olympics or World Championship events. They do not allow themselves the luxury of a negative thought during their preparation. Instead, they use visualization to literally create a winning state of mind.  The mental preparedness is equally as important as the physical aspect of their training. Therefore, with discipline, repetition and practice, you can begin to alter the pattern of your thinking in order override the “pre-programmed” response mechanism.

 

 

The world through kaleidoscope eyes

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“The voyage of discovery is not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes”…Marcel Proust

This morning I found myself tuned into my favourite radio station, singing along with the Beatles and their memorable hit “Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds”.  It made me curious about the origin of the lyrics, so I decided to do some research. The “Lucy” in the song was a classmate of John Lennon’s eldest son, Julian. Julian had drawn a picture of Lucy as well as stars in the sky and brought it home from school one day when he was four years old. He called the picture “Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds”. Many people thought that the initials of the song as well as the lyrics represented getting high on the drug LSD.  Rolling Stone magazine once asked John Lennon about this very question. He told the reporter that he had never even considered the initials of the song, let alone the interpretation. Personally, I remain curious about Lucy. Was she the “the girl with kaleidoscope eyes” or was it ultimately Yoko Ono? Perhaps we will never know.

My findings about the song caused me to ponder the manner in which we attach meaning to things, even though we may not have all the facts. If all of us interpreted people, their behaviour and situations in an identical fashion, the world would quickly become a dull place. Instead, consider looking at life through a kaleidoscope and become an “observer of beautiful forms” (the ancient Greek translation for kaleidoscope). We can unravel a deeper meaning behind what we think we see when we become more receptive to looking at life through a broader lens. How often have you found that your original perception of a particular person or circumstance was flawed?  Upon further investigation, you uncovered fresh and exciting information that gave you a renewed appreciation for the relationship. These are the experiences that we need to draw upon whenever we catch ourselves in “black and white” mode; convinced that we are right. Instead, when you find yourself taking a myopic view, consider the words of French novelist Marcel Proust: “The voyage of discovery is not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes.”

 

Photo by Koratmember

Flexing your resiliency muscle

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When you search the word “resiliency” on Google, you will see over 5, 500,000 results. What a fascinating statistic for a word that encapsulates an essential character trait that lies at the core of every individual. What makes a person resilient? Can resiliency be taught or are some people better able to rebound from adversity than others? There is certainly a “buzz” around the term in business as well…given the volatility of the economy. What about the roller coaster ride of the stock market that many of us are reluctantly enduring, even though the nausea has us reaching out for the airsickness bag on a regular basis? Why do we choose to stick it out? Is it due to the fact that we are enjoying the ride? I don’t think so.  Or, perhaps it is because we identify with this premise: We are eternally optimistic about the future because we possess an inner- knowing based on our past risk-taking experiences that ultimately, the economy will prevail and the peaks and valleys are part of the journey. This is more than practicing blind faith.  Rather, by viewing current circumstances in these terms, we are demonstrating an understanding of what it means to employ resiliency as a habit.

Our professional and personal lives are inexorably linked.  We have learned that adversity is a natural part of every aspect of our lives. We know that although there are times when the discomfort is almost too much to bear, the alternative option of panic would place us in an anxiety-prone state; yielding results that could be far worse. Resiliency is the cornerstone of our emotional and psychological survival in challenging times. We often underestimate our ability to rise above extremely difficult situations.

For example, at a recent meeting of the American Psychological Association, the question of resiliency in relation to aftermath of the terrorist attacks on September 11, 2001 was on the agenda. Although there was general agreement regarding the psychological magnitude immediately following the event, there were differences in opinion regarding the long-term impact. One psychologist commented as follows:  “I think we are wired to deal with trauma…It’s not only in the person. There’s lots of other factors that determine whether (a person will) be resilient or not…Part of it has to do with who they are, their circumstances, the resources at their disposal, their own trauma histories. They’re less resilient if they have health problems or a history of traumatic reactions, or lack economic resources.”

In order to rise above current challenges,  we need to focus on developing a mindset of managing rather than coping . Getting a grip, is hardly a proactive approach! Yet, it is a business and life strategy that many individuals and organizations adopt in order to deal with adversity as well as uncertainty.  Rather, the solution lies in the willingness to dig deep and gain strength from past experiences. We can overcome seemingly  impossible challenges in the present by drawing upon our own inner resources.  Ask yourself: “How do I perceive the enormity of my current challenge?”  When faced with a particular conundrum that feels overwhelming, reflect on a different time in your life when you felt similar angst and were able to triumph over the situation. As a result, you will prove to yourself that your resiliency muscle can be exercised anytime. All that is needed now is for you to flex it!

Applying the wisdom of Polonius in uncertain times

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I recently attended the National Speakers Association Annual Convention. It is always a highlight of my own professional development quest and yearly “boost”. I see myself as a lifelong learner who can always find someone who is further along in my career and life path to teach me a great deal. For example, I had the pleasure of hearing the legendary Les Brown who rocked the house full of speakers; demonstrating not only the art of connecting with the audience and crafting a memorable speech, he also shared three thoughts on why people are failing today:

1. Most people don’t believe in themselves
2. They are influenced by negative information
3. They are in a new world and need a new mindset

Les’s presentation resonated with me because I share his philosophy. I believe that the solution to these three problems lies in getting to the essence of what rings true for you. Once you focus on what is within your control and you resolve to channel your energy in that direction, life becomes easier and more joyful. Business decisions become less complex when the focus is more about responding rather than reacting to economic forces over which you have no control. You can disseminate information and then decide on your own truth. However, the degree to which you are able to differentiate yourself from the opinions of others will determine how easily you are able to make up your own mind about your current reality. A multitude of forces can sway you in a particular direction…either positive or negative. This is true for individuals as well as businesses of every description. The proliferation of media; both on- line and in traditional formats, are vying for your attention at an unprecedented rate. Therefore, the ability to discern fact from fiction, genuineness from phoniness, substance from fiction is not as easy as it used to be. In the play Hamlet, by William Shakespeare, the fictional character Polonius said: “This above all: To thine own self be true.”

Consider the life path of Kyle Maynard. Kyle is an extraordinary 25 year old motivational speaker who was born with a condition known as congenital amputation that has left him with arms that end at the elbows and legs that end near his knees. When many thought he was crazy, he learned how to become a wrestler and mix martial arts champion; excelling at both. Kyle also shared his powerful message at the convention, delivering insights on dealing with his own self-doubt and the many occasions when he chose not to buy into the negative opinions of others.

Here is what I learned from Kyle:

1. Put your mind to work and everything is possible
2. Negative thoughts are at the core of self-limiting beliefs
3. You have the power to formulate your own attitudes and transform your current reality

The answer to this burning question: “How well do you know yourself?” can lead you to a new world and a new reality. It may require a radical rearrangement of your current way of thinking. It may mean letting go of assumptions that are no longer serving you.  It may necessitate separating yourself from all the negative influencers in order to create different outcomes personally and professionally. One thing I know for certain is that the exploration is a worthy endeavor.

Are you being sucked into the vortex of negativity?

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The degree to which we allow ourselves to be influenced by others cannot be understated. By “others” we may consider the mass media as well as individuals in our personal and professional circle. We rely on mass media to obtain information in order to stay abreast of local, national and global news, to educate ourselves regarding purchasing decisions of every description. We gain trust and establish loyalty patterns with a particular media source and view the source as credible and reputable. Yet, due to a series of mergers and acquisitions over the past fifty years, ninety five percent of information sources are now owned by only five companies. The impact of their influence on business and society as a whole is profound. They shape our culture and value systems; therefore it is no surprise that there is push-back when it comes to challenging the status quo or even more interestingly, we have more difficulty discerning our core truth. What do we truly believe to be true?

How do we extricate ourselves from the power of their influence? When we read about the down economy, “the great recession” we believe this to be the universal truth. We see the statistics, we hear the news broadcasts, we read the tweets, the blogs, books…the negative headlines are all-consuming. When enough people tell us that “things are really bad…they couldn’t get any worse”,   the negative message continues to be reinforced.

 Therefore, it is not a surprise that the process of discerning your own reality becomes even more difficult. Ask yourself: “What is my truth”?  Dig deep to find your own interpretation of what rings true for you. Are you holding yourself back from taking a risk that would completely re-energize and reinvigorate you; whether it is a new career, or starting a business that is your true passion? Identify the emotion that is standing in your way.  Do you associate with negative people? What can you personally do to overcome these obstacles? When your desire to create change is greater than your desire to repeat the same pattern that continues to yield the same result, you will then be ready to let go and respond differently to the negative influencers.

The transactional age is dead. Long live the relational age of doing business

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The relational component in business dynamics has always been essential. However, with the proliferation of social media and competition for business on so many platforms, your ability to connect with a client or prospective client is your point of difference. In addition, we need to do so with a meaningful purpose. Doing business “quid pro quo” won’t work anymore;  especially at a time when  we seemingly do not have enough hours in the day and still find that we are subtly or not so subtly being distracted by annoying spam email and phone or text bleeps. All this noise has made us all the more savvy regarding attempts to build genuine versus phony business relationships.

Here are five quick ways to build purposeful client connections:

1. Pay attention to the personal side of a client conversation. This week, I remembered something a client told me almost a year ago about one of their children and he was impressed when I mentioned it during a phone call.

2.  When you reach out to a client, think about the most appropriate way to connect that works for them. Be flexible and put significant thought into the purpose of your letter, call, email or text message. 

3. Make an effort to educate yourself and keep current regarding the pressing business issues for your clients. What is “top of mind” for them? By including references to their world and their challenges, you are far more likely to build or maintain the connection.

4. It is tempting to live by Margaret Thatcher’s famous quote: “I am extraordinarily patient, provided I get my own way in the end!” Instead, respect the connection process and the client’s timeframe for decision-making.

5.  Teach others and live by example. Regularly remind your team of the human element when answering the phone or greeting a client at the front counter or reception. Otherwise, you may as well install a ticket machine!

Are you a “desk” potato? The benefits of workplace wellness

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It is one thing to be a “couch” potato…Are you a “desk” potato? Chances are that if you are both, you are heading for health problems. If your well-being is a value that you live by, then you are probably aware of the negative implications of being sedentary at your desk each work day and you make sure you get up and move whenever you can. How about your employer? The research confirms that optimum physical heath translates into better mental health. Therefore, better mental health means that both you and your employer will benefit because you are more productive. A “Living Strong” Blog report noted that by investing in wellness programs and encouraging healthier lifestyles, organizations will see improvement in employee morale, decreased absenteeism, lower health plan costs, improved productivity and increased company revenues.

In one of the only longitudinal studies undertaken on this subject, the University of Michigan proved that it pays to create a culture of wellness. They tracked the impact of a Midwest Utility Company’s implementation and investment in their wellness programs over nine years. The company realized a net savings of $4.8 million in employee health and lost work time costs. This week, CBS early morning news Health Watch segment featured New Jersey- based PHH Corporation as an example of an incentive-based wellness employer offering staff $1,000 a year to make measureable improvements to their heath. Many employees wear a pedometer and simply plug it in to their computers to track their walking success! They are rewarded for the miles clocked up just by walking around their workplace! The segment noted that for every dollar a company spends on wellness, their ROI (return on their investment) can be three to six times higher!

Adapting workplace wellness programs need not be financially prohibitive. Research the numerous pages available on line that describe best practices around the world.  Check out The Government of Alberta’s Healthy U webpage; as well as “Look Good Feel Great Always” blogs, great resources for you and your workplace to get healthy!

Sixty Seconds On-line: The new imperative for every business

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Life is just a minute. Only sixty seconds in it. Forced upon me, can’t refuse it, Didn’t seek it, didn’t choose it. But it’s up to me to use it. I must suffer if I lose it. Give account if I abuse it. Just a tiny little minute. But an eternity is in it! -Dr. Benjamin Mays

When I came across this amusing and interesting infographic that illustrates what happens every minute on the internet, it made me think of Alvin Toffler’s book, Future Shock,(1970), where he popularized the term “information overload”. Could anyone have imagined then how profoundly the world would change? Consider the enormous amount of information and dialogue happening on-line today. For example, every sixty seconds there are: 100+ new LinkedIn accounts, over 98,000 tweets, 1500 blog posts—the list goes on.

From a business perspective, consider what are you contributing to the social media conversation. The new imperative for us all is to keep up and connect. How are you linked in with this enormous amount of knowledge? Do you know your customers’ social media preferences and are you communicating with them based on their preferences, rather than your own? From a personal leadership perspective, how are you standing out in this ever-expanding crowd? Are you ensuring that you’re not intimidated by this vast global network, but are instead benefiting?

Where is your head? It matters more than your skill set!

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Paul G. Stoltz, Ph.D. has written a fascinating article in Psychology Today, entitled: “Six Ways Mindset Helps You Win at Work.” Thousands of employers in numerous industries and countries were asked if they would prefer to hire a candidate with “perfect skills and qualifications” or one with a mindset that fit the job and company. Almost unanimously—98 per cent—they chose the candidate with the right mindset. The companies further believed that they could predict the mindset of people they would want to hire within the next decade (96 per cent) and thought it far more likely that new hires would develop necessary skills rather than an appropriate mindset (97 per cent). People with the right mindset were chosen as more likely to receive a pay raise or promotion. Perhaps most incredibly, when asked how many ‘regular’ employees they’d trade for a person with the right attitude, the average response was 7.2.

Dr. Stoltz’ findings show that a positive attitude and a demonstrated positive mindset—one which shows “openness and connectivity,” “integrity and kindness,” “resilience, tenacity and intensity”—are a far more valuable attribute than any other, whether looking for a new job, a pay raise or a corner office. The right attitude makes any employee as valuable as seven of his or her peers in the eyes of coworkers and managers.

In recent years, we have witnessed a proliferation in the number of “happiness” books and surveys. It makes sense that most of us see this as the optimal way to live life and look for resources that help us to achieve this state of being.  In fact, the quest to measure happiness has gone global. In 2008, the World Values Survey found that freedom of choice, gender equality, and increased tolerance are responsible for a considerable rise in overall world happiness.

In her book “Happiness at Work…Maximizing your Psychological Capital for Success” Jessica Pryce-Jones says that “the starting point of happiness at work is that it is self-initiated.” This supports my argument that practicing personal leadership; taking charge of our thoughts and actions, is a choice that is always available to anyone who is ready and willing to lead themselves.

Try this quick quiz (answer “yes” or “no”) to see if you are in the right headspace at work:

  1. I speak well of my colleagues in their presence as well as their absence
  2. I express any concerns regarding people and processes in a positive manner
  3. I give the same level of service internally as I do with my external clients
  4. I am aware of my non-verbal communication
  5. I think before I speak; most of the time
  6. If there are misunderstandings, I am able to let them go rather than ruminating
  7. I think of my work in “big picture” terms, rather than routine or mundane
  8. I recognize positive consequences of honing my listening abilities
  9. I am conscious of my mood and how it impacts others
  10.  When I attempt doing something that takes me outside of my comfort zone, I consider the “best case” rather than “worst case” outcome.

Scoring

 7 – 10 “yes” responses

You understand that your mindset contributes to the overall atmosphere. When you put your best foot forward, you realize that your actions create synergy. You can “rise above” the differences and maintain a positive outlook.

 4 – 6 “yes” responses

You are conscious of your thoughts, however you often feel powerless over them. Although you recognize that changing your outlook and responses could be liberating, you find that concentrating on the positive takes more effort

 3 or less “yes” responses

Focusing on the “negative” is habitual and your self-perception is limiting your opportunities; professionally and personally. The willingness to view people and situations through a different lens isn’t a priority. You may be at “burnout” and need more than a vacation or a job-change to get out of your own head.